Posts in Category

Post-its

I came across an obituary written by the individual who passed away. He wrote a brief paragraph where he mentioned his loved ones, gave gratitude to those who made a difference throughout his life, and thanked his fortune for having had the opportunity to live exactly the way he wanted for as long as he lived.  

It was the most interesting, real, and moving obituary I’ve ever read. I feel that he intended to leave a note of appreciation and love to the world, and highlight the celebration of his life in the way he saw it: full and happy.  

Naturally, I got to thinking about what I would write if I were to think about leaving my own obituary for the world to see. First, an important note: this is not an exercise in coming to terms with one’s mortality or the finite and transient nature of those we love; rather, it’s a pause to reflect on our final act of farewell and my thoughts on this memento mori written by a stranger and found by me in a newspaper.

I mulled over what I would write for mine…“I enjoyed everything, and tried to live without boundaries”? “My home is everywhere, and my heart is everywhere”?
Then I thought, maybe: “I didn’t let people happen to me”?(BTW, the last one is a reference to a Harvey Milk quote that haunts me almost every day).

What did those first drafts have in common? I realized that they were bullshit. Why? Because everything we feel is true today about our existence in this world could be an absolute lie tomorrow – by virtue of controlled or uncontrolled circumstances.

So my working obituary draft as of this moment reads: “I’m a journeywoman; I’ve been on this interesting road for a while, but now it’s time for me to change direction and destination – at least for the foreseeable future.”

That would probably be the most honest and truthful obituary I could write.

For now.

This can’t be forgotten.

It can’t be unread or unheard.

So I’m sharing this gem of a quote from Harvey Milk, via ThoughtCatalog.

No editing of the expletives. Let it be as raw as the meaning intended. 

 

“Go after her. Fuck, don’t sit there and wait for her to call, go after her because that’s what you should do if you love someone, don’t wait for them to give you a sign cause it might never come, don’t let people happen to you, don’t let me happen to you, or her, she’s not a fucking television show or tornado. There are people I might have loved had they gotten on the airplane or run down the street after me or called me up drunk at four in the morning because they need to tell me right now and because they cannot regret this and I always thought I’d be the only one doing crazy things for people who would never give enough of a fuck to do it back or to act like idiots or be entirely vulnerable and honest and making someone fall in love with you is easy and flying 3000 miles on four days notice because you can’t just sit there and do nothing and breathe into telephones is not everyone’s idea of love but it is the way I can recognize it because that is what I do. Go scream it and be with her in meaningful ways because that is beautiful and that is generous and that is what loving someone is, that is raw and that is unguarded, and that is all that is worth anything, really.”

 

Search stories by typing keyword and hit enter to begin searching.